What To Do If The Wellness Program ‘Let You Down’
The ups and downs of a wellness program
You start a new program and you love it. You start to see results and feel a shift in your mindset. You have insights that blow open even your most confusing habits. You feel amazing. Then week 5 rolls around. Your results start to slow, and your insights aren’t coming as fast as they once were.
And somehow, the strategies that felt like the holy grail now feel oppressive and pointless. However this is exactly where you need to be. This place of ‘pointlessness’ and slowed results is where the change you seek lives. And here’s why.
The ‘high’ starts to dwindle
First month of a new wellness program is always super exciting. You start to make lifestyle changes and even begin to fix some habits that may have been going on for a while. These new changes and insights create this feeling of good within you. You can start to feel that change is happening, and its almost like this feeling of a high.
And then inevitably, by month 2 or 3, you get this routine like feeling where it doesn’t feel as new and exciting. You may feel like the changes aren’t coming as quickly and maybe the hits aren’t coming as fast as they once did in the beginning of the program. And because some who are in wellness programs often have a background of eating disorders, that feeling of a high is something they have experience in. Whether it was emotional eating or binge eating, that addicting feeling to a high with food is then translated into an addicting feeling to the high of the wellness program. However, the highs of change in relation to making progress is not what progress should feel like.
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What progress should feel like
A lot of what emotional eating and nutrition coaching is about is trying to find a moderate approach. And the irony in that is that sometimes we do have to trigger eating disorders. We often have to initially go onto that addictive nervous system feeling with the highs of the change. However, that addictive high feeling isn’t what we want to connect to as feeling like were making progress.
We dont want progress to feel like a high and we dont want to associate our progress with feeling the high. That dynamic of progress and a high is why we end up being addicted to food or having cravings or eating emotionally to begin with. Because wanting that feeling of soothing, and that want of something happening immediately, is what typically leads to emotional eating.
What is emotional eating?
Emotional eating is a common habit where food is utilized to suppress and soothe uncertain feelings or negative emotions. The negative emotions then often result in feeling a type of emptiness or an even emotional void.
Those who emotionally eat believe that food could be a way to fill that void. And by using food as a void filler it then creates a false feeling of ‘fullness’ or temporary wholeness. These uncertain feelings or negative emotions can be triggered by a variety of factors such as stress, financial struggles, relationship issues or life transitions.
It can present itself as binge eating and could even inspire feelings of guilt or shame leading to a cycle of excess eating. Emotional eating is typically associated to issues of weight gain, depression, and skin issues. It often results in a life long struggle between your relationship to food and your way of living.
A healthier relationship to food
When we’re trying to make the change of how we can develop a healthier relationship to food, we often go back to the beginning where that high feeling started. When we go back and see what we did in the past, it can be really exciting and fun to re-realize these highs and have these insights once more. But going back to the beginning is not the goal.
The goal is to get to a more neutral and moderate place with your relationship to food.
4 things to remember in order to reach your goal
When you do inevitably get to that place where things start to feel more boring, and when the changes dont seem to happen as quickly, there are 4 things to remember in order to stay on your wellness path and reach your goal.
1.Connect to aspirations
When you first start your wellness program or journey, connect to the aspiration of how you want to feel. Whether you are a client of a wellness program or doing it on your own, it’s important to first recognize how you want to feel in yourself before you start. Then if you happen to feel like things aren’t moving forward, you can go back and re-connect to your initial aspirations. Because by re-connecting to how you initially stated you wanted to feel, you won’t feel the need to go back for that ‘high’ instead.
2.Reflect on the why
It’s important to continuously keep reflecting on your why.
Why are you doing this?
Why did you choose a wellness program to begin with?
Why were you inspired to make this change and take this leap?
Just like connecting to your aspirations, by reflecting on the whys you are able to recognize what your initial intentions on starting this wellness program and journey were. And you’re less likely to go back to the beginning in search of that ‘high’.
3.Refine your structure
Continuously refining your action steps and structure that you need for the program will help you to stay motivated. Start with small little refinements and point out those tiny things that you need to make a change in. We do this because we want to teach our nervous system and our brain that we don’t need to have these huge swings in order to feel like change is happening. That by beginning to lock into these small little shifts, you can give yourself that same great feeling of change that is happening within you.
4.Adaptation & accountability
Something that might have worked for you in the beginning of your program, may not work for you a few weeks or months down the line. This is why it’s important for you to continue to adapt. Adaptation and accountability are the pillars for change. Being able to adapt to the program and then being accountable to those adaptations is the key to change itself. Those are the skills of being able to adapt and being able to hold yourself accountable are the ones you want to build. Not only for the duration of the program, but for your future self in other circumstances as well. Adaptation and accountability are what’s missing between why something might not have worked before and how it will work in the future.
Those who are more susceptible to feeling ‘let down’ by their wellness program
While anyone can be susceptible to that feeling of being ‘let down’ by their wellness program, there are certain lifestyles that are more likely to attract those feelings. Once you recognize that you fall within one of these lifestyles, you will be one step closer to conquering your wellness program and reaching your goals. However if you don’t find yourself falling within one of these lifestyles, just remember the 4 previously stated objectives and you will still be able to reach your goal.
Eating disorders
Those who have a history with eating disorders are more likely to feel like their wellness program let them down. Those who have struggled with eating disorders, are familiar with that ‘high’ and will most likely look for that in their wellness program. Moreover, once they feel that ‘high’ begin to dissipate around month 2 they are more likely to re-start their program in order to feel that ‘high’ once more.
what can be done
Instead of going on a continuous search for that ‘high’, try to reflect on why you started this wellness program in the beginning. It’s important to remind yourself why you chose to do this program and what you initially hoped to get out of it so that you can stay on track. If that doesn’t work, try to find that ‘high’ your seeking through other outlets like yoga, running or a hobby you enjoy.
Scared of change
Those who are reluctant to allow change and are typically stuck in their ways are more likely to feel as if their wellness program let them down and they need to restart it. They might be afraid or unsure of change, and instead of moving through the ending of that ‘high’ they might go back to the beginning so that they don’t have to stop feeling it.
what can be done
Instead of being unsure or afraid of what change could bring, try to slowly integrate change in little by little. You can start with small little refinements of change, and then by pointing out those tiny things you could be one step closer to accepting change.
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A lot of people want to stop having that up and down relationship to food, and they want to reach their goal. However there’s often a point in the program where things might start to feel boring. And that feeling where change has stopped happening, more often then not, causes most to go back to how it was before. And they don’t know why.
But the why is that you need to figure out a way to anchor yourself in the neutral. Once you get yourself and your mindset into this neutral and moderate place, is when the sensations of change won’t be as extreme or complacent as they once were.
Extra tips for sticking to your wellness program
Set realistic expectations for yourself. Having realistic expectations increases your chances of maintaining healthy lifestyle behaviors during and after your wellness program.
Don’t go into your wellness program with an all or nothing approach.
Reject the urge to judge your day as good or bad. This can help prevent you from feeling guilt or shame if you’ve had a bad day, and can help prevent you from over indulging on a good day.
Integrate some type of exercise into your daily life if you have not already. Whether it’s yoga, swimming, running or walking, even just 30 minutes a day can make an overall difference.
